My very first guest post!
I met Nicole Derr of NMD Photography and her adorable daughter Addison at a Mommy & Me group at the Noggin Factory in Dover in 2011. As time passed, I admired her strength and determination to do what was best for her daughter. I asked her to share her story of breastfeeding a baby with severe food allergies in the hopes that her story would help and inspire other new moms!
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I Survived, and You Can Too!
I’ve been staring at this jar of Nutella for 15 months now, and tomorrow, I am finally going to open the darn thing up and dig in. Perhaps only the arrival of our daughter, Addison, has been met with more anticipation.
I’m here to attest to the fact that indeed, a desperate chocoholic like myself can in fact make The Ultimate Sacrifice for her child, every single day for said 15 months.
Here’s the backstory: (If you want the short version, just skip down to the Survival Food List and Survival Strategy List!) We welcomed Addison into the world on January 8th of 2011. Aside from being the World’s Most Beautiful Baby, she was such a dream at first; she was all cuddly and would nap for hours on our chests, and make these adorable little satisfied noises when she nursed. And then one night after a week or two, she cried inconsolably for two hours straight. And then the next night she cried for three hours. And then she started crying, at top volume, for hours, at any time of the day or
night. Being a first time mom, I was horrified and overwhelmed but folks kept telling me that it was common for babies to be “fussy” at night. The pediatrician said she was just fine. She just has a lot of gas. I should try to relax.
Addison’s screaming wasn’t fussing. It didn’t wind up gradually and peak and then die down. She would be sleeping soundly and awake with a start and a shrill shriek and then nothing-- not nursing, not Colic Calm, not bouncing, or swinging or swaddling or promising to buy her a unicorn would calm her. To me, it was clear that she was in pain.
And I felt utterly powerless to help her.
One day when Addison was four weeks old, a friend came over with her three month old. I absolutely couldn’t get my mind around the fact that her baby didn’t cry (beyond fussing to nurse) for the entire two hour visit. The whole time! Meanwhile Addie was having a particularly bad day and maybe stopped crying for 20 minutes of their visit. I decided to take matters into my own hands. I did some research and decided to go on a total elimination diet to figure out once and for all if Addison’s pain was being caused by something I was eating. I just didn’t buy it that one month old babies were typically this unhappy, or had diapers full of mucousy poop, or projectile vomited on a daily basis.
Eliminating all potential allergenic foods pretty much leaves you with meat, rice, vegetables and some fruit. I was a woman on a mission. I didn’t even use salt and pepper. I was totally clueless. And starving.
I figured it would just be for a week, just to see. No change. Ok two more days. Nothing.
Finally one day she had a poop that showed some flecks of blood, and at last our pediatrician began taking me seriously and scheduled an appointment for the next morning. The tested the stool and turns out it was chock full of blood. Digested blood is green. So my girl’s intestines were so irritated that they were bleeding and she was pooping it all out. Odd as it sounds, this was a relief for me: at last we are going to get somewhere with this and she is going to feel better. After having me collect her stool--
and enduring her pain-- for a week (I’ll leave the details of how to collect diariaah from a diaper to your imagination, and tell you only that it involves saran wrap and popsicle sticks) they finally referred us to a Pediatric GI specialist.
We drove out to Manchester to hear some pretty simple news: she definitely has a protein allergy. It is either dairy, soy or egg. Stop eating those and she will get better. Come back in three months. Nothing else you eat will have an effect or her. The reaction to these proteins builds up over time in the gut, so it’s not like giving them up for a week or two will have much difference. It has to be for good. (“For Good,” I thought, at this point, was until our recheck at 5 months). This was great news because
there were so many things that I could add back in, with wheat being the saving grace. However after the initial euphoria of eating bread wore off (bakery bread sans soy of course)... we were left with a major challenge.
I thank my lucky stars that my husband is so supportive of breastfeeding, and also that he’s such a good cook.(He’s the chef in our house, and I clean). While he didn’t have to live without butter, or cheese, or basically anything that comes in a box or a wrapper, he has gone to the end of the Earth to make my food life bearable. Prepared meals of quinoa, spinach and chicken in the fridge for my lunch. Pasta separated for me with my “special” butter on it. Bags of the “special” chocolate chips. It took us a while to compile the list of must have items for this diet, and once we got those staples, it was
really quite bearable. At home, except when I caught a glance of the dreaded Nutella jar, I rarely felt deprived.
Survival Food List:
Hannaford store brand bagels (select flavors only are soy free-- plain, multigrain,
sesame), Hannaford brand pizza dough- (You can make a decent cheese free calzone
with said dough. My fav was chicken and pesto), and Hannaford brand Stoned Wheat
Thin crackers
Enjoy Life chocolate (the dark is not half bad. The milk tastes like cardboard. I may
recant the “half bad” once I eat real chocolate again, but to me, it now passes as
chocolate)
Earth’s Best Soy Free Spread (find it at Market Basket or Wal-Mart)
Almond milk
Quinoa, rice, most pastas
Coconut milk ice cream (chocolate or vanilla. The others have soy). Try with fresh fruit
or with maple syrup on top.
Follow that with the Survival Strategy List:
Trust your Mother Instinct, even if you’re a first time mom. Get a second opinion.
Read labels like a psycho person and don’t necessarily believe people when they tell you something is dairy/soy/egg free. (Not on purpose, but people don’t realize the many forms that these ingredients can take, and that they’re in nearly everything. They also don’t realize that one bite of something with butter, for example, will have your baby up crying all night).
Avoid parties and gatherings where food is the center of activity. These will leave you feeling deprived, jealous, and bitter.
Find support. Friends, husband, a doula.
Figure out foods that still feel like “treats” and eat them regularly to keep from feeling like binging. You may have to shell out more money (ie coconut ice cream) but this is the key to keeping on.
Figure out dates with your spouse that don’t involve food. (This is no small feat. Everything seems to involve food).
Keep emergency snacks in your diaper bag since you can’t stop for a quick bite.
Remind yourself how lucky you are that your baby’s pain can be solved without medical
intervention, and think of this as a way that you can take care of them.
Remind yourself that this is not forever.
Remind yourself that hypoallergenic formula costs a fortune, smells like butt, and is mostly high fructose corn syrup. Not an option.
Now, Addison is 17 months old, and fully weaned as of last week. I came downstairs from putting her to bed without nursing, bawled in my husband’s arms for a few minutes, and then promptly dove in to eating a key lime pie complete with store bought crust.
The best part of the diet: the total awe and appreciation for food that comes when it’s over! And the weirdest part? It’s been over a week now... and I haven’t had a single bite of chocolate. I guess the hiatus curbed my cravings. But knowing that I CAN dip into that Nutella whenever it strikes my fancy? Priceless.
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UPDATE: Nicole just welcomed baby #2! See the adorable photos here!
Nicole is the owner of NMD Photography. Check out her work at www.nmdphotography.com
Do you need support around dealing with a baby with food allergies? Dover Doula (www.doverdoula.com) provides help with breastfeeding and postpartum doula services.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Monday, May 14, 2012
Yoga Birth Method - Use Yoga During Labor
Are you starting to wonder how that baby inside of you is going to come out? Interested in exploring natural childbirth and learning ways to manage labor pain naturally? Check out my Yoga Birth Method workshops and learn to use the power of yoga breathing and poses to work with your body to manage the pain of labor and to help labor progress faster.
The Yoga Birth Method workshop is designed for pregnant women and their labor support partners. At this workshop, you will learn a very specific sequence of breathing techniques and yoga postures that are adapted to the physical and emotional changes of the different stages of labor. This will enable you to manage contractions from a calm, meditative and controlled perspective.
The Yoga Birth Method is for women who are interested in educating themselves about natural childbirth and empowering themselves during their own baby's birth.
This is a hands-on workshop where you will learn how to work with your body and connect to your baby during birth to take you out of the experience of pain and connect you to the experience of giving birth.
Benefits of the Yoga Birth Method:
- Faster labor progression as the yoga poses encourage the baby's movement into the birth canal
- Learn to remain focused and in control of your birth experience in a positive manner
- A deep mother-baby connection as they work together during labor
- Birth partners learn specific techniques to physically and emotionally assist the woman during labor
Click here to find an upcoming Yoga Birth Method workshop in Dover, NH! Or contact Darcy directly to schedule a private, in-home Yoga Birth Method class for you and your partner.
The Yoga Birth Method is a great compliment to Birthing From Within, Hypnobirth, Bradley or Lamaze class. It is also a great fit for hospital births, home births and birth center births.
Darcy Sauers is a certified Yoga Birth Method instructor and a Prenatal Yoga teacher. She is also a DONA certified Postpartum Doula and Certified Lactation Counselor. Darcy teaches prenatal yoga classes and Yoga Birth Method workshops and private sessions in the Seacoast area of New Hampshire. She is the owner of Dover Doula and a member of Great Bay Doulas. Darcy lives in Dover, NH with her husband and three children. For more information on her upcoming classes and workshops, please visit www.doverdoula.com. She can be reached at 603-988-5945 or darcy@doverdoula.com.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Choosing to Breastfeed
Despite what friends and family may have told you, breastfeeding can be easy and painless. The key to success is to ask for help and support early and often. And, women in New Hampshire
Breastfeeding Benefits for Mom:
There are many proven health benefits for women who choose to breastfeed! Women who do not breastfeed are at a greater risk of breast cancer. Your breast cancer risk is reduced by 7% for each birth and at an additional rate of 4.3% per month that you continue breastfeeding.[1]
Research has also found that women who do not breastfeed are at a greater risk for developing ovarian cancer and Type 2 Diabetes. Breastfeeding for 18 months or more was associated with a significant decrease in ovarian cancer risk (compared to not breastfeeding). For each month of breastfeeding the relative risk was decreased by 2%.[3]
Increasing the duration of breastfeeding is also associated with a decreased risk of Type 2 Diabetes. For each additional year of lactation, women had a decrease in the risk of Type 2 Diabetes of 14-15%.[4]
If you are pregnant and want to breastfeed, set yourself up for success. Ask yourself:
1. Does my birth place encourage Skin to Skin for one hour immediately after delivery for a non-medicated birth and Skin to Skin for two hours after a medicated birth?
2. Does my birth place have Lactation Counselors on staff?
3. Does the pediatrician I have chosen have Lactation Counselors on staff?
4. Which of my friends who have breastfed successfully would be able to offer me non-judgemental support?
5. What breastfeeding support groups are available in my area?
6. Who are the private Certified Lactation Counselors in my area?
7. Who are the certified Postpartum Doulas in my area?
Keep this list of answers handy for when your baby arrives. And, do not hesitate to reach out with all questions and for any help you may need.
One of the most important things you can do to establish a successful breastfeeding relationship is to have continuous Skin to Skin contact with your baby immediately after birth. Skin to Skin should last for one hour if you’ve had a natural, un-medicated birth. If you had any medications during labor, Skin to Skin should be for a continuous two hour period to give the baby a little more time. When babies are allowed to have this quiet time on their moms, they are able to latch successfully and start breastfeeding at their own pace.
And remember, if it hurts, ask for help! Take advantage of the many available resources around you.
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula¸ lactation counselor and the owner of Dover
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Breastfeeding help in Seacoast, NH area
Do you need a little help with breastfeeding? New moms in the Seacoast, NH area are lucky to have many ways to get help. Besides hiring a lactation consultant to come to your home, there are lots of great options in the Seacoast area where you can not only get together with other moms and babies, but also have your questions answered by lactation counselors.
Breastfeeding Support Groups
Wentworth Douglass Hospital in Dover, NH
Come and meet other new parents and discuss topics of concern to you. Facilitated by lactation consultants and child life specialists. Held every Monday, EXCEPT for holidays, 1:30-3pm. No registration necessary for this class.
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Portsmouth Regional Hospital
Our Breast Feeding Support Group meets every Wednesday from 10:00 am to 12 noon in the Maternity Family Room at Portsmouth Regional Hospital.Exeter Hospital
The group meets every Tuesday from 11:00am - 12:30 noon. This group provides the added support needed for the changing needs of a growing baby. This is also a time to foster mother to mother support and assistance. A lactation consultant is available during this time.
Frisbie Memorial Hospital in Rochester, NH
Frisbie’s Mom and Baby Group held on Wednesdays from 9:30 a.m.— 11:30 a.m.
Seacoast Area La Leche League
On the first Wednesday of each month, we have an morning meeting at the The First Baptist Church in Exeter, NH. The meeting starts at 10:30am and usually runs until 11:30am with a half hour informal period afterwards. The First Baptist Church is located at 2 Spring Street in Exeter at the corner of Spring and Front. For more information or parking details, contact Traci (603) 397-5235 LLLTRACI@GMAIL.COM.
On the first Wednesday of each month, we have an evening meeting at the Coastal Family Birth Retreat in Stratham, NH. The meeting starts at 6:30pm and usually runs until 7:30pm with a half hour informal period afterwards. Coastal Family Birth Retreat is located at 13 Frying Pan Lane in Stratham. For more information, contact Traci (603) 397-5235. *Welcomes fathers, partners and husbands to join us.
On the second Thursday of each month, we have a morning meeting in the nursery of the First Parish Church in Dover, NH. The meeting starts at 10:30am and usually runs until 11:30am with a half hour informal period afterwards. The First Parish Church is located on the corner of Central Ave and Silver Street in Dover. For more information, contact Colleen at (603) 294-4352.
Of course, you also have the option of hiring a Lactation Counselor to come to your home for some private, one on one help!
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula, certified lactation counselor and the owner of Dover Doula (www.doverdoula.com) in the Seacoast, NH area. She is passionately committed to helping new moms find the support, resources and information that they need. Please do not hesitate to contact Darcy with any questions at darcy@doverdoula.com or 603-988-5945. For more information on breastfeeding, the postpartum period and local resources and events for new moms, follow her on Facebook.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Where to go with your baby in Dover, NH
So, you have a new baby and you've finally mastered getting him in and out of the carseat. You know what to pack in your diaper bag and you are comfortable with feeding him in public. Great!
But...where do you go?
Getting out of the house is not only a multi-hour project, it is also vitally important to your mental health. One of the best ways to beat the baby blues is to leave your house with the baby and spend some time with other adults. The perfect scenario is a Mommy & Me group or class, places where you can hang out and not have to leave if your baby gets hungry or starts to cry.
These groups also give you a chance to connect with other local moms who have babies the same age as yours and perhaps develop friendships. Below you will find a list, but be sure to "like" me on Facebook for the most updated info on local classess and resources.
Here's a day-by-day guide to getting out of the house with your baby in the Dover, NH area:
MONDAYS:
9:30 - 10:30 am NOGGIN FACTORY, Dover NH
But...where do you go?
Getting out of the house is not only a multi-hour project, it is also vitally important to your mental health. One of the best ways to beat the baby blues is to leave your house with the baby and spend some time with other adults. The perfect scenario is a Mommy & Me group or class, places where you can hang out and not have to leave if your baby gets hungry or starts to cry.
These groups also give you a chance to connect with other local moms who have babies the same age as yours and perhaps develop friendships. Below you will find a list, but be sure to "like" me on Facebook for the most updated info on local classess and resources.
Here's a day-by-day guide to getting out of the house with your baby in the Dover, NH area:
MONDAYS:
9:30 - 10:30 am NOGGIN FACTORY, Dover NH
New Baby Play Group
This is an open and free Play Group for wee ones ages birth to 12 months and their caregivers. New Baby Play Group is mostly participant driven, though we will occasionally schedule special guests to present information about popular topics. Special sessions will be announced on Facebook. We recommend that you bring a blanket for baby.
http://www.nogginfactorytoys.com/
Also - check out the Noggin Factory's private nursing and changing room - open every day!
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12:00 - 1:00 pm Peace Baby Yoga at ChildLight Yoga in Dover
In this special class, you will learn yoga and infant massage for baby, as well as some restorative yoga and affirmations for you. For more info and to register: http://www.childlightyoga.com/
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1:30 pm - 3:00 pm New Parent Support Group at Wentworth Douglass Hospital
1:00 - 2:30 pm Hatchlings Group at SEACOAST BIRTH MATTERS in Kittery, ME
This is an open and free Play Group for wee ones ages birth to 12 months and their caregivers. New Baby Play Group is mostly participant driven, though we will occasionally schedule special guests to present information about popular topics. Special sessions will be announced on Facebook. We recommend that you bring a blanket for baby.
http://www.nogginfactorytoys.com/
Also - check out the Noggin Factory's private nursing and changing room - open every day!
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10:30 - 12:00 PM TWICE THE FUN in Dover, NH
Busy Babies class on Mondays 10:30 – 12 Noon – for babies 18 months and under
*********12:00 - 1:00 pm Peace Baby Yoga at ChildLight Yoga in Dover
In this special class, you will learn yoga and infant massage for baby, as well as some restorative yoga and affirmations for you. For more info and to register: http://www.childlightyoga.com/
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1:30 pm - 3:00 pm New Parent Support Group at Wentworth Douglass Hospital
Come and meet other new parents and discuss topics of concern to you. Facilitated by lactation consultants and child life specialists. Held every Monday, EXCEPT for holidays, 1:30-3pm. No registration necessary for this class. They even have a scale for weighing your baby!
TUESDAYS: 10:30 - 11:30 am Baby Signs Class at Seacoast Birth Matters in Kittery, ME “Sign, See & Play” with Heather Mladek http://www.seacoastbirthmatters.org/ class starts on 3/13 WEDNESDAYS:
9:30 - 11:30 am at Frisbie Memorial Hospital in Rochester, NH
Frisbie’s Mom and Baby Group held on Wednesdays from 9:30 a.m.— 11:30 a.m.
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CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF NH in Dover
First Friends Playgroup
Wednesdays,March 7 - April 11 (no playgroup 4/18 & 4:25) 9:30 - 11:00 am
The Children’s Museum of New Hampshire is offering a new weekly program for its very youngest visitors. The First Friends Playgroup for children ages 6 months – two years will be offered on Wednesday mornings. Parents and children are invited to come to the museum from 9:30 – 11 am to meet and play together on the second floor of the museum. This area features the Primary Place exhibit area designed especially for babies and toddlers, as well as other engaging exhibits. This informal program is included in the museum’s regular admission price and is free for museum members. The non-member price of admission at the Children’s Museum of New Hampshire is $9 for adults and children, and $8 for adults age 65+. Children under age one are always admitted at no charge.
THURSDAYS: 10:00 - 11:00 am Mom & Baby Yoga at ChildLight Yoga in Dover Interested in a gentle and safe way to begin to restore your body to its pre-pregnancy state, but don't want to leave your baby? Here's the perfect class for you! For more info and to register: http://www.childlightyoga.com/ ************** | |
1:00 - 2:30 pm Hatchlings Group at SEACOAST BIRTH MATTERS in Kittery, ME
Hatchlings: Babies 0-4 months
Get support, resources & stay connected with other parents as you navigate the parenting waters. Honest, open & non-judgmental discussions about “newborn” parenting are held weekly.
Am I missing something? Please let me know at darcy @ doverdoula.com.
http://www.doverdoula.com/
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula, lactation counselor and the owner ofDover
Am I missing something? Please let me know at darcy @ doverdoula.com.
http://www.doverdoula.com/
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula, lactation counselor and the owner of
Friday, October 21, 2011
The Three S's for Moms
Many of you may be familiar with the 5 S's for babies from the Happiest Baby on the Block book (shushing, swaddling, sucking, swinging and side/stomach positioning). They are great and do provide a lot of calming to a baby.
However, as a postpartum doula, I am also very interested in having a calm Mom! So, I would like to take this opportunity to present my Three S's for moms. These three S's will help a new mom stay calm, avoid postpartum blues and mood disorders and most of all enjoy her baby. A happy and relaxed mom can take better care of her baby. And also - YOU DESERVE IT!
Dover Doula's Three S's:
1. Sleep - There is nothing, absolutely nothing, like the sleep deprivation that comes along with a newborn. So, go lay down in your bed EVERY SINGLE CHANCE YOU GET! This means: napping when the baby naps, napping when your partner gets home from work, napping when a friend comes to visit (they only want to hold the baby anyway), napping on the couch when your baby is safely snuggled on your chest, napping when your doula comes, napping all the time!
Not only are you exhausted from all the nighttime feedings, but your body needs to recover and heal from birth (particularly if you've had a cesarean birth). The only time your body can heal is when it is relaxed and resting. Also, if you are breastfeeding, you need to be getting enough sleep so that your body can produce milk. Breastfeeding burns a lot of calories/energy!
So, after you read #2 and #3 - close your laptop and go lay down!
2. Sustenance - nourish yourself so that you can sustain life - your own and your baby's. Drink plenty of water to help withe healing process, cleansing process and the production of milk. Eat yummy, warm, healthy food. Change your morning routine to having your partner cook you a nice big breakfast before leaving for work. Eating lots of healthy meals and snacks throughout the day helps keep your blood sugar steady and your head clear.
Breathe! Throughout the day, notice your posture and try to sit up straight, allowing your lungs to fill to capacity as you inhale. As you exhale, feel your navel pulling in toward your spine and imagine that you are exhaling all the stale air up and out from the bottom of your lungs. Taking some moments to take some nice deep breaths can rejuvenate and relax you.
3. Self-care - New moms (hey - all moms!) need to put a lot of focus on self-care. The postpartum time period is a sacred time. Nurture yourself. Be sure you are resting when the baby rests, eating healthy meals and snacks, drinking plenty of water. Yes, it would be fantastic if you could sneek away for a massage or a pedicure, but let's get real here. Self-care can also be as simple as ensuring you have a moment to brush your teeth, taking the time to take a nice, long, hot shower. Massaging your skin with a gentle oil. Enjoying a nice, long snuggle on the couch with your yummy baby. Self-care means postponing the thank you note writing while you and your baby go back to bed after the first early morning feeding.
This is hard, because your "mother bear" instincts are kicking in full force with a rush of natural hormones and it is completely normal and common to put the baby first. New moms tend to push their own basic needs to the back burner as they focus on their baby, but as any good flight attendant worth their salty peanuts will tell you, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first, before you can help your baby.
Take care of yourself. Put yourself first - ahead of the laundry, the thank you notes, the unpacking, and the dishes. Step over that laundry basket and go for a walk outside for some fresh air and sunshine. Close the door on the unfinished nursery, light a candle and take a nice long soak in the tub.
You, and your baby, are worth it.
However, as a postpartum doula, I am also very interested in having a calm Mom! So, I would like to take this opportunity to present my Three S's for moms. These three S's will help a new mom stay calm, avoid postpartum blues and mood disorders and most of all enjoy her baby. A happy and relaxed mom can take better care of her baby. And also - YOU DESERVE IT!
Dover Doula's Three S's:
1. Sleep - There is nothing, absolutely nothing, like the sleep deprivation that comes along with a newborn. So, go lay down in your bed EVERY SINGLE CHANCE YOU GET! This means: napping when the baby naps, napping when your partner gets home from work, napping when a friend comes to visit (they only want to hold the baby anyway), napping on the couch when your baby is safely snuggled on your chest, napping when your doula comes, napping all the time!
Not only are you exhausted from all the nighttime feedings, but your body needs to recover and heal from birth (particularly if you've had a cesarean birth). The only time your body can heal is when it is relaxed and resting. Also, if you are breastfeeding, you need to be getting enough sleep so that your body can produce milk. Breastfeeding burns a lot of calories/energy!
So, after you read #2 and #3 - close your laptop and go lay down!
2. Sustenance - nourish yourself so that you can sustain life - your own and your baby's. Drink plenty of water to help withe healing process, cleansing process and the production of milk. Eat yummy, warm, healthy food. Change your morning routine to having your partner cook you a nice big breakfast before leaving for work. Eating lots of healthy meals and snacks throughout the day helps keep your blood sugar steady and your head clear.
Breathe! Throughout the day, notice your posture and try to sit up straight, allowing your lungs to fill to capacity as you inhale. As you exhale, feel your navel pulling in toward your spine and imagine that you are exhaling all the stale air up and out from the bottom of your lungs. Taking some moments to take some nice deep breaths can rejuvenate and relax you.
3. Self-care - New moms (hey - all moms!) need to put a lot of focus on self-care. The postpartum time period is a sacred time. Nurture yourself. Be sure you are resting when the baby rests, eating healthy meals and snacks, drinking plenty of water. Yes, it would be fantastic if you could sneek away for a massage or a pedicure, but let's get real here. Self-care can also be as simple as ensuring you have a moment to brush your teeth, taking the time to take a nice, long, hot shower. Massaging your skin with a gentle oil. Enjoying a nice, long snuggle on the couch with your yummy baby. Self-care means postponing the thank you note writing while you and your baby go back to bed after the first early morning feeding.
This is hard, because your "mother bear" instincts are kicking in full force with a rush of natural hormones and it is completely normal and common to put the baby first. New moms tend to push their own basic needs to the back burner as they focus on their baby, but as any good flight attendant worth their salty peanuts will tell you, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first, before you can help your baby.
Take care of yourself. Put yourself first - ahead of the laundry, the thank you notes, the unpacking, and the dishes. Step over that laundry basket and go for a walk outside for some fresh air and sunshine. Close the door on the unfinished nursery, light a candle and take a nice long soak in the tub.
You, and your baby, are worth it.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
The Witching Hour
You've had a long day of feeding, burping, wearing spit up, singing nursery rhymes, feeding, burping, bouncing, walking, feeding, burping, etc. It's 5:00 pm and you are just waiting for your sweetie pie to walk through that door.
And then it starts. The fussing and the crying. Maybe even some screaming. It's the Witching Hour.
Before you know it, your sweetie pie has called to say he'll be late and you and the baby are both sobbing. And that's usually when you also realize you haven't even brushed your teeth yet. Never mind had a shower.
Does the so-called Witching Hour exist? It sure does! Is there anything you can do to help your baby avoid The Witching Hour? There sure is!
The Witching Hour is simply your baby's reaction to a long day of stimulation. Remember, this baby just spent nine months in your womb. Being here on the "outside" is like Disneyworld to him or her, even if you never left the first floor of your house.
When my clients ask about the Witching Hour, I always tell them that babies are like computers. And sometimes you just have to re-boot.
When I say "re-boot", what I really mean is try to recreate the womb. Allow your baby to relax in a womb-like setting to counteract the stimulation from the day and let you both relax.
Steps for recreating the womb:
1. Dim the lights
2. Turn off the tv, music and the ringer on your phone
3. Swaddle the baby up
4. Depending on the level of fussiness either sit down and snuggle the baby, holding him or her really close to you with his ear resting right next to your mouth. Whisper and/or sing softly to your baby. Or, if the baby is really worked up, start to bounce/pace/swing your baby while "shushing" in his or her ear.
These steps will help the baby to feel safe and make it easier for him/her to calm down.
Tips for avoiding the Witching Hour:
1. Allow your baby to sleep as much as s/he can during the day. Babies need LOTS of sleep. This helps them avoid that over-tired, over-stimulated state.
2. Keep your daily activities to a minimum. Both you and the baby need to rest and take it easy.
3. Watch your baby's cues. If s/he is slowing down and not really focusing on anything, give him or her a break. The baby is probably ready for a nap.
4. Limit visitors. I know it's hard because you want to show your baby off and the whole world wants to come see him/her. But long days of visitors can wear both you and the baby out.
Two VERY important things to keep in mind while dealing with the Witching Hour.
1. When your baby is upset, s/he learns that you will be there to comfort him or her. This is an important thing for them to learn - that they can trust you.
2. This is normal. Find solace in the fact that thousand of other new parents are pacing the halls of their own homes across the globe at this very moment.
When the baby does eventually calm down, reheat that lasagna your neighbor brought over and then call a friend or a postpartum doula to come over the next day and help you get a break.
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula¸ lactation counselor and the owner ofDover
And then it starts. The fussing and the crying. Maybe even some screaming. It's the Witching Hour.
Before you know it, your sweetie pie has called to say he'll be late and you and the baby are both sobbing. And that's usually when you also realize you haven't even brushed your teeth yet. Never mind had a shower.
Does the so-called Witching Hour exist? It sure does! Is there anything you can do to help your baby avoid The Witching Hour? There sure is!
The Witching Hour is simply your baby's reaction to a long day of stimulation. Remember, this baby just spent nine months in your womb. Being here on the "outside" is like Disneyworld to him or her, even if you never left the first floor of your house.
When my clients ask about the Witching Hour, I always tell them that babies are like computers. And sometimes you just have to re-boot.
When I say "re-boot", what I really mean is try to recreate the womb. Allow your baby to relax in a womb-like setting to counteract the stimulation from the day and let you both relax.
Steps for recreating the womb:
1. Dim the lights
2. Turn off the tv, music and the ringer on your phone
3. Swaddle the baby up
4. Depending on the level of fussiness either sit down and snuggle the baby, holding him or her really close to you with his ear resting right next to your mouth. Whisper and/or sing softly to your baby. Or, if the baby is really worked up, start to bounce/pace/swing your baby while "shushing" in his or her ear.
These steps will help the baby to feel safe and make it easier for him/her to calm down.
Tips for avoiding the Witching Hour:
1. Allow your baby to sleep as much as s/he can during the day. Babies need LOTS of sleep. This helps them avoid that over-tired, over-stimulated state.
2. Keep your daily activities to a minimum. Both you and the baby need to rest and take it easy.
3. Watch your baby's cues. If s/he is slowing down and not really focusing on anything, give him or her a break. The baby is probably ready for a nap.
4. Limit visitors. I know it's hard because you want to show your baby off and the whole world wants to come see him/her. But long days of visitors can wear both you and the baby out.
Two VERY important things to keep in mind while dealing with the Witching Hour.
1. When your baby is upset, s/he learns that you will be there to comfort him or her. This is an important thing for them to learn - that they can trust you.
2. This is normal. Find solace in the fact that thousand of other new parents are pacing the halls of their own homes across the globe at this very moment.
When the baby does eventually calm down, reheat that lasagna your neighbor brought over and then call a friend or a postpartum doula to come over the next day and help you get a break.
Darcy Sauers is a certified postpartum doula¸ lactation counselor and the owner of
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